When Pilo Attacks You

This week has been one of the most disastrous for me. Well, I was not destroyed but my nose nearly got wiped out, literally. Oh… aliens attacked my nose. Yes, aliens in the form of a Pilo (Boil). Then what happened? An epic battle began and I bravely fought my own war against Piloism by largely lying down on my bed and watching, ah…hearing, George W Bush in self-congratulatory mood and telling the world, yet again, how his fight against terrorism was producing a vibrant democracy in Iraq. I decided to use no WMDs whatsoever against my enemy because I wanted the fight go insurgency way. I relied on my white blood cells, the traditional police against bacteria and virus.

(Pic will be reposted soon.)

Pilo Pidit Wagle (Wagle, the Pilo victim): I think this gloomy mood, captured by Shaligram Tiwari this afternoon in a teashop outside my office, reflects the sufferings I went through in the last four days because of pilo (boil). Look at that black spot on the right part of my nose. [Wagle, while posting this photo, hopes that possible girlfriend will understand him for, well, everything!]

Four days, spending inside the room, covered by blankets, listening to news coming out from radio and TV, were like four full boring years. Sachin Tendulkar hit his 35th ton and he was on Aaj Tak. How could I miss? I couldn’t see him (and that wasn’t necessary) but heard his as the master blaster hit back queries filed by Prabhu Chawla. Once I thought what will happen if I turned blind for ever? Would I be able to live as usual? No, of course not. Weird thought. Okay, then there was (on Star World) the Miss World competition in Sanya, China. That needed to be seen by the eyes. Ears weren’t useful at all. How could I miss? Pilo couldn’t stop me from seeing beautiful ladies fighting for the crown.

Body was there on the bed but mind was visiting around the world: from one corner to another as newsreader turned her pages on TV. For a few seconds, I was in Harvard University listening to Muhammad El Baradei, the IAEA chief (on BBC World) before filing a question to Condoleezza Rice. Well, I was the judge of the Miss World competition asking questions to ladies. That was a beautiful moment. I find no time to mention all the virtual places I went while lying on the bed. Oh… height of imagination. You can be anywhere in the world at any time. Mind travels fast.

At least two moments (when Pilo needed to be squeezed) were unforgettably painful as if insurgency was at its height. The side effect spread in my whole body in the form of light fever: I thought it was 102 in but Email, after inspecting the thermometer, insisted on saying that I was hot by 99 degrees only.

So, naak ma pili (boil on the nose) is in no way a thing to be proud of. “What happen to you?” people asked because they are concerned. When you reply, the concern turns into laughter, a satirical one. “Naak ma pilo?” people ask as if that was result of a crime. Yes, naak ma pilo. Quite painful. But many of my friends and well-wishers who called me in my house ended the conversation with some consolation.

Back in office, everyone inquired. What happened to Wagle? Pilo, I answered pointing to my nose, right over here. What? Naak ma pilo? Again, my pilo was “stigmatized” for a few seconds at first and adorned later with consolatory remarks. I am no alien to pilos. A few months ago, it was on my knee. Before that, it was a little below that. Before that it was near elbow. Nearly three years ago, it was on my chin.

But then no one is alien to pilos. Every one of them had a story or two to tell. Yes, about pilo. Their experiences. Oh… my God. I discovered, pilo has left no one. Almost all are victims of pilo at least once. I found hardly anyone one who had pilo on the nose. Someone had on upper lip. One had on both cheeks. He used medicine and that didn’t work and his cheek has now a dimple. The pilo phenomena is that it appears mostly on butts. Some told me their stories when pilo attacked them on their butts.

“Man, its more painful than on the nose,” he said. One friend told me a story of how one of his friends suffered a pilo on butt while travelling India a few years ago. I haven’t had that experience as yet. Some friends, smiling at me, said that pilo was a sign of good days ahead. I don’t know. I am always hopeful about the future but for now as I am recovering from the pilo it is hard to forget the pain I experienced in the recent past.